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adyashanti
May 2008 
waiting? awakening isn't about putting in your time
Posted on Feb 6th, 2007
by 
evelyn
evelyn
Placing a long comment in response to Al and Julian over at Julian's blog here for prosperity' sake (whatever that is) because it's relevant to the discussion of how and why realization matters.
First off, I guess I wasn't clear about what I meant about global awakening. I don't see it as some singular global thunderbolt event whereupon everyone awakens to their true nature on the same minute on the same day in 2012. To me, it doesn't matter how long it takes. I do the service that is presented in front of me moment to moment coming through me (rather than by me) for as long as it takes, as many lifetimes as it takes. All while knowing only Now exists.
That said I do sense (no proof or evidence, only anecdotal, only intuition) that there is a quickening or acceleration happening. I see more and more people around me waking. Siona's post on Maitreya reminded me that Maitreya means the Friend. What I've seen in my own sphere is that something is rippling out in an organic fashion: one friend awakens, and then that person is there for another of their friends, and so forth. Mostly occuring through direct transmission in a very subtle and simple network effect.
In my experience, I think many many many people are ready because it's simply who they are.
I was feeling a bit lost after a multiday meditation retreat in 2005 because if you listen closely to most spiritual teachers they tell you this spiritual stuff is all about putting in your time. Read between the lines, and they're telling everyone that Enlightenment is a far off fantasy which few beings are worthy to attain. (Ultimately this is what they believe is true, not being done out of malevolence or anything like that.)
What a godsend to find the biography of Dipa Ma at the bookstore near my PO Box on my way home after this retreat. Short version: simple middle-aged widow in Calcutta awakens, and helps her villagers awaken through meditative practices incorporated into the everyday - nursing, ironing, whatever.
This was a turning point in my life. There and then I knew it was possible in the mundance world - I did not need to enter a monastery - and it was possible in this lifetime.
From then on I was on the direct path.
After initial awakening, one realizes that This is self-liberating and nothing needs to be done…it's doing. But often people seek living guides for that threshold into realizing that nothing needs to be done.
This discussion has sparked an understanding where people are coming from and maybe I wager I'm on a different page about the fundamentals in the fundamental principles (“in light of the fundamental principles of spiritual awakening and experience”) than Julian and Al and perhaps others based on their writings.
This is already long, but here's a nutshell:
I was far from any mentally stable place in 2001 myself. I was so depressed and numb that 9/11 didn't even register a blip for me: “Like what else can go wrong?” When therapists and coaches would ask, ”Where do you feel that?” I didn't know what they meant by where in the body. I lived totally in my head, and that mind was spinning out of control. By mid-2002 I realized the questions I had no traditional therapist could me help me with.
I think if I had to categorize myself on the SD spiral I was making a transition from orange to green in 2001. Yes, I agree that there is some time needed to prepare the body/brain, but not so much as everyone thinks either…I've written [to a mathematically inclined friend]:
"Psychology is helpful in terms of developing strong healthy sense of self so we don't have a nervous breakdown or experience psychosis when our sense of self bursts into free, luminous, open space.
There is a like a circle or mathematical set that we enclose around our concept of ourself and label let's say for instance “Evelyn.” That Evelyn circle can be pretty small, constrained and limited if our self-esteem is shot through trauma, etc. So Western psychology is useful towards expanding that circle wider and wider and wider so that it's not so constrained. But as big as it gets it will always hit a limit to where the finite brain can go. There is still a circle/set, albeit very large.
There comes a point where what I'm talking about has no divisions, no seams, no lines for circles, no sets. It's Setless.”
As Mahatma Gandhi once said, ”Even one person who is awake can change the world.”
p.s. I've heard it been said that the direct path is risky and fraught with danger. But in my experience staying in illusion, or delusion, is far far riskier. This ain't about 'helping' any deluded misguided souls out there to attain something better but rather simply seeing through and through who they are which means really truly seeing through and through who you are and what everyone is simultaneously all at once .
image "The Spirt Within Me" by Oleg Zhivetin: "I show in my paintings what people cannot see in real life. I show individuality, the intelligence, dreams and emotions, that every human being is different and because of that, they are beautiful"...Oleg Zhivetin
Update: I received an email that got me pondering. Here's my response:
It may be later, or tomorrow, before I can address all the points in this exchange. Thanks for pointing out and reminding me that what I'm writing is not necessarily meant for everyone to apply, but rather those that know that there is no self experentially, not philosophically.
“”The expanding of the circle of self is not the extinguishment of ego-self identity, the identity of the seperate ego-being. Thus, expanding the circle of self is not the same as non-dual realisation.”
I didn't say it was. I meant to say that this is what most of the aim of self-improvement, self-help, and much of therapy is about - widening the diameter of an imaginary circle. But rare is it to find someone that asks you to consider if that so-called line drawn in shape of a circle was a mental abstract concept imposed on something totally without boundaries…and that in fact, perhaps, there is no circle or seam whatsoever.
Those that have that felt sense, they do have capacity to see the Buddha-nature or the Christ consciousness in Other because they know there is no Other. We often falter since yes there is still imaginary smudges remaining faintly in shape of circle, but it's definitely definitely possible. I have witnessed this myself in small groups that's prime purpose was awakening.
“As an extreme example, imagine a new-ager telling the mother of a child which is starving to death due to the greed and selfishness of others: “this is all an illusion, your child chose this”. ”
Hmmm, I've never said anything about choice. Illusion, yes.
Seeing through and through isn't done through words or preaching or explaining dharma even. It is direct transmission. Of course, I am violating that ideal right now ;-)
So I think I hear you. You are saying people that aren't ready will read my words in this blog and misinterpret and misuse them somehow?
(I have another much more popular blog intended for general public at http://evelynrodriguez.typepad.com where I try and avoid nonduality language as it's meaningless to nearly everyone….)
I guess I tend to agree with you that this philosophizing and trying to describe the ineffable isn't really helpful. I thought it may be for those on the cusp, or those already familiar with satori. But my gut tells me that there is another way.
Thank you & namaste, e
p.s. How I keep forgetting that tantrikas don't philosophize, they write poetry. (Show, don't tell.)
First off, I guess I wasn't clear about what I meant about global awakening. I don't see it as some singular global thunderbolt event whereupon everyone awakens to their true nature on the same minute on the same day in 2012. To me, it doesn't matter how long it takes. I do the service that is presented in front of me moment to moment coming through me (rather than by me) for as long as it takes, as many lifetimes as it takes. All while knowing only Now exists.
That said I do sense (no proof or evidence, only anecdotal, only intuition) that there is a quickening or acceleration happening. I see more and more people around me waking. Siona's post on Maitreya reminded me that Maitreya means the Friend. What I've seen in my own sphere is that something is rippling out in an organic fashion: one friend awakens, and then that person is there for another of their friends, and so forth. Mostly occuring through direct transmission in a very subtle and simple network effect.
In my experience, I think many many many people are ready because it's simply who they are.
I was feeling a bit lost after a multiday meditation retreat in 2005 because if you listen closely to most spiritual teachers they tell you this spiritual stuff is all about putting in your time. Read between the lines, and they're telling everyone that Enlightenment is a far off fantasy which few beings are worthy to attain. (Ultimately this is what they believe is true, not being done out of malevolence or anything like that.)
What a godsend to find the biography of Dipa Ma at the bookstore near my PO Box on my way home after this retreat. Short version: simple middle-aged widow in Calcutta awakens, and helps her villagers awaken through meditative practices incorporated into the everyday - nursing, ironing, whatever.
This was a turning point in my life. There and then I knew it was possible in the mundance world - I did not need to enter a monastery - and it was possible in this lifetime.
From then on I was on the direct path.
After initial awakening, one realizes that This is self-liberating and nothing needs to be done…it's doing. But often people seek living guides for that threshold into realizing that nothing needs to be done.
This discussion has sparked an understanding where people are coming from and maybe I wager I'm on a different page about the fundamentals in the fundamental principles (“in light of the fundamental principles of spiritual awakening and experience”) than Julian and Al and perhaps others based on their writings.
This is already long, but here's a nutshell:
“Do not improve yourself past that which is already whole. And return the favor. That's the saving of the world. Return the favor and see it over there. Wherever over there is - to your left, to your right, behind you, upside down, under your feet. See wholeness there. That's the transformation of everything. If you don't see wholeness in everything around you, that's the continuation of ignorance, the continuation of violence….
I guarantee you that one being who sees the Buddha in you is worth more than reading ten thousand books about the Buddha. One being who actually knows that there is only the Buddha and that nothing else is going on has a more powerful effect than anything else.” - Adyashanti, from ”Emptiness Dancing “
I was far from any mentally stable place in 2001 myself. I was so depressed and numb that 9/11 didn't even register a blip for me: “Like what else can go wrong?” When therapists and coaches would ask, ”Where do you feel that?” I didn't know what they meant by where in the body. I lived totally in my head, and that mind was spinning out of control. By mid-2002 I realized the questions I had no traditional therapist could me help me with.
I think if I had to categorize myself on the SD spiral I was making a transition from orange to green in 2001. Yes, I agree that there is some time needed to prepare the body/brain, but not so much as everyone thinks either…I've written [to a mathematically inclined friend]:
"Psychology is helpful in terms of developing strong healthy sense of self so we don't have a nervous breakdown or experience psychosis when our sense of self bursts into free, luminous, open space.
There is a like a circle or mathematical set that we enclose around our concept of ourself and label let's say for instance “Evelyn.” That Evelyn circle can be pretty small, constrained and limited if our self-esteem is shot through trauma, etc. So Western psychology is useful towards expanding that circle wider and wider and wider so that it's not so constrained. But as big as it gets it will always hit a limit to where the finite brain can go. There is still a circle/set, albeit very large.
There comes a point where what I'm talking about has no divisions, no seams, no lines for circles, no sets. It's Setless.”
As Mahatma Gandhi once said, ”Even one person who is awake can change the world.”
p.s. I've heard it been said that the direct path is risky and fraught with danger. But in my experience staying in illusion, or delusion, is far far riskier. This ain't about 'helping' any deluded misguided souls out there to attain something better but rather simply seeing through and through who they are which means really truly seeing through and through who you are and what everyone is simultaneously all at once .
image "The Spirt Within Me" by Oleg Zhivetin: "I show in my paintings what people cannot see in real life. I show individuality, the intelligence, dreams and emotions, that every human being is different and because of that, they are beautiful"...Oleg Zhivetin
Update: I received an email that got me pondering. Here's my response:
It may be later, or tomorrow, before I can address all the points in this exchange. Thanks for pointing out and reminding me that what I'm writing is not necessarily meant for everyone to apply, but rather those that know that there is no self experentially, not philosophically.
“”The expanding of the circle of self is not the extinguishment of ego-self identity, the identity of the seperate ego-being. Thus, expanding the circle of self is not the same as non-dual realisation.”
I didn't say it was. I meant to say that this is what most of the aim of self-improvement, self-help, and much of therapy is about - widening the diameter of an imaginary circle. But rare is it to find someone that asks you to consider if that so-called line drawn in shape of a circle was a mental abstract concept imposed on something totally without boundaries…and that in fact, perhaps, there is no circle or seam whatsoever.
Those that have that felt sense, they do have capacity to see the Buddha-nature or the Christ consciousness in Other because they know there is no Other. We often falter since yes there is still imaginary smudges remaining faintly in shape of circle, but it's definitely definitely possible. I have witnessed this myself in small groups that's prime purpose was awakening.
“As an extreme example, imagine a new-ager telling the mother of a child which is starving to death due to the greed and selfishness of others: “this is all an illusion, your child chose this”. ”
Hmmm, I've never said anything about choice. Illusion, yes.
Seeing through and through isn't done through words or preaching or explaining dharma even. It is direct transmission. Of course, I am violating that ideal right now ;-)
So I think I hear you. You are saying people that aren't ready will read my words in this blog and misinterpret and misuse them somehow?
(I have another much more popular blog intended for general public at http://evelynrodriguez.typepad.com where I try and avoid nonduality language as it's meaningless to nearly everyone….)
I guess I tend to agree with you that this philosophizing and trying to describe the ineffable isn't really helpful. I thought it may be for those on the cusp, or those already familiar with satori. But my gut tells me that there is another way.
Thank you & namaste, e
p.s. How I keep forgetting that tantrikas don't philosophize, they write poetry. (Show, don't tell.)
Access: PublicTagged with: awakening, maitreya, enlightenment, direct+path, psychotherapy, spiral+dynamics, adyashanti
Ev: Thanks for pointing out and reminding me that what I'm writing is not necessarily meant for everyone to apply, but rather those that know that there is no self experentially, not philosophically.
Al: And also, perhaps, to gain acknowledgement, probably from people who believe they know (who would be likely to give such acknowledgement), do you think, maybe?
Otherwise, why make pronouncements of things which are self-evident to those who would understand what you are saying on the level of experience, and who understand that it is only in the experience that such statements are really true?
Ev: “”The expanding of the circle of self is not the extinguishment of ego-self identity, the identity of the separate ego-being. Thus, expanding the circle of self is not the same as non-dual realisation.”
I didn't say it was. I meant to say that this is what most of the aim of self-improvement, self-help, and much of therapy is about - widening the diameter of an imaginary circle. But rare is it to find someone that asks you to consider if that so-called line drawn in shape of a circle was a mental abstract concept imposed on something totally without boundaries…and that in fact, perhaps, there is no circle or seam whatsoever.
al: Well, the thing is, there IS a circle, and it IS real, at least insomuch as peoples authentic experience goes, from the level which they are at.
To deny this experience of ego-identity before it is actually true that it has been extinguished, is to deny the actuality of our state of being in the moment, and hence to deceive ourselves. Ie, to be inauthentic… Even while we know its not real, its still real in that it still exists in our awareness as our experience right?
To be inauthentic is actually very un-spiritual, don't you think? (since God is Truth)
Ev: Those that have that felt sense, they do have capacity to see the Buddha-nature or the Christ consciousness in Other because they know there is no Other. We often falter since yes there is still imaginary smudges remaining faintly in shape of circle, but it's definitely definitely possible. I have witnessed this myself in small groups that's prime purpose was awakening.
Right, generally speaking, 'spiritual awakening' seems to be a process, and hence there are stages within that process, where we have had a glimpse, of that reality, but before it is fully realised.
Perhaps part of that process is also acting in accordance with that glimpse instead of our previously more limited identity and experience; however, it still seems important to me not to decieve ourselves regarding the actuality of our state, since this precludes moving closer to the 'final realisation'. So glimpsing something closer to enlightenment is not the same as liberation.
Of course, it doesn't help to deny the actuality of our glimpses either. As you know they are far more real than anything else we experience. But even though we know what we experience as an ego-identity is not the actuality of what really is, cos we have seen something closer to Reality, does not mean we have 'arrived' yet either.
What is the actuality of our experience?
Do we still suffer?
Yes, most likely we do. Even buddha experienced pain while in a body, and since, while in this world, we are empathically linked to all other life here, we experience the pain of all the rest as well, don't we? So we are not entirely free, even if we are 'more free' than we once were for knowing that our experience of our 'self' is not the actuality of what really is. Still, it is our experience right?
Ev: “As an extreme example, imagine a new-ager telling the mother of a child which is starving to death due to the greed and selfishness of others: “this is all an illusion, your child chose this”. ”
Hmmm, I've never said anything about choice. Illusion, yes.
Al: No, you didn't say anything about choice, i was just using a theoretical example as an illustration, not paraphrasing what you said.
An illusion is an illusion when we have the capacity to see it as an illusion, and not simply say or believe that it is. When said illusion still defines our experience and existence, conceptually it is an illusion, but in the actuality of our experience, it behaves in the same way as a reality doesn't it?
Ev: Seeing through and through isn't done through words or preaching or explaining dharma even.
Right, i say pretty much the same thing above. It requires something exceptional, a 'touch of grace', say, to see things as they are.
'A touch of grace' cannot be made to happen, but it can be invited, through earnest seeking for the truth, out of compassion for all life.
Ev: It is direct transmission.
Al: A direct transmission of the Truth is something quite exceptional. It can cause something to kindle in us, it may ignite the Reality in our being; but it still requires the following through of a process which may be initiated by a direct transmission. It is a gift, but each must walk the steps, even if we are all helped along the way.
Ev: Of course, I am violating that ideal right now ;-)
Al: Someone said once 'concepts only approximate reality', and words generally deal with concepts.
Ev: So I think I hear you. You are saying people that aren't ready will read my words in this blog and misinterpret and misuse them somehow?
Al: Everything which is grasped onto by the ego-identity is turned into something which can be used by that ego identity for its own self interests. Primarily those interests are: to preserve and reinforce its existence. The truth, in its undiluted form, threatens the very core of that ego-identity.
Until that ego-identity is entirely extinguished, and where there once was an 'i' there is instead only truth, we must always be vigilant and watchful that our own ego-identity isn't co-opting these spiritual things for its own purposes.
We also can take steps to minimise the misuse other ego-identities will make of potentially potent spiritual-philosophical ideas and ideals by not banalizing them, or intimating that we can use these concepts and ideas to replace facing the authentic reality of our experience just as it is at this moment.
Ev: I guess I tend to agree with you that this philosophizing and trying to describe the ineffable isn't really helpful.
No, the ineffable really cannot be described, except in vague metaphoric terms, and more easily by elucidating what it is NOT.
Ev: I thought it may be for those on the cusp, or those already familiar with satori. But my gut tells me that there is another way.
Well, those familiar with satori are guided primarily by their own inner revelation. In that case, there is definite understanding, but it takes place on its own level, and generally fares better when not dragged out into the realm where it may be exposed to the graspability of our own ego's and others. At least, not unless it is the right time and place for such a sharing.
The immediate need, as far as most 'spiritual' types are concerned, is for the revelation of what is NOT. The way this takes place is many and varied, but being authentic and grounded about our experience is definitely a good beginning.
I for one, am as grateful for the exposure of a delusion as i am for the revelation of a Truth.
Regards,
al
Lovely, lovely post. You go, girl! -B
There are blackbirds in the country who know your song. Evelyn, Evelyn: already home. Garudas traverse all possible universes in a split second.
~ Kisses from M
Hi Al, (we've corresponding on this topic via email too)
I apologize for taking so long to get back with you. I think I needed time to let the mud settle - and for a bit there had a deluded thought that stirring up the pond was helping matters, so that took a bit longer to settle into stillness than usual.
First, I want to say I really appreciate your emails. They helped me get over yet another blind spot. So for that I am truly grateful. I don't think I'll be addressing your points one by one, because I'm rather in a different frame of mind and more inclined towards your view than I was when this exchange began, so a lot of them would be simply “yep, uh-uh”.
“We also can take steps to minimise the misuse other ego-identities will make of potentially potent spiritual-philosophical ideas and ideals by not banalizing them, or intimating that we can use these concepts and ideas to replace facing the authentic reality of our experience just as it is at this moment.”
Well, this could easily be one of those yep, uh-uhs. Especially as you say in acknowledging our actual experience in the moment.
I see the danger now the platitudes of nondual speak as I have a friend that comes to our weekly ”Daring to Live an Authentic Life” group (note the use of Authentic rather than Awakened ;-) – well, that's because the awakening was more recent, and I co-founded the group two years ago…but I digress).
She just came back from a month with a nondual teacher and says she learned that “we are all one, this is all a dream, and we can never be separate, yada yada yada”. Oy vay! (I've never shared with the group my so-called awakening. I am either living it, or I ain't.)
But she was just quoting someone else's direct revelation. And that is not so helpful, as you pointed out.
Luckily, she went to see Byron Katie yesterday, so all is not lost ;-)
So I'm with you that “the immediate need, as far as most 'spiritual' types are concerned, is for the revelation of what is NOT.” And that's why I am a huge fan of Byron Katie's work.
“I for one, am as grateful for the exposure of a delusion as i am for the revelation of a Truth.”
Yes, I am too. That's why I am tremendously grateful.
“And also, perhaps, to gain acknowledgement, probably from people who believe they know (who would be likely to give such acknowledgement), do you think, maybe?”
I think I was feeling an edginess towards the whole world that week. (That exasperation that unravels boddhisattvas.) Sometimes I simply don't understand why everyone is pretending to not be awake and lucid and so I have that temptation to be done with it and so want to shake people by the shoulders to snap them out of it. Of course, I see it clearly as projection and my own egoic stuff showing up. Ah, and so another opportunity to confront yet another blind spot.
Possibility that I was seeking acknowledgment is doubtful in my case, as I'd been rather quite fond of my self-image of being seen as “normal” and fitting in with “normal” society.
BUT I do think I was feeling constrained by this self-image and I think the weariness of “hiding the light behind the bushel” was getting to me. It was a bit freeing to say some truth out loud and not be afraid….yet probably not necessary (but who knows, I am also trying to quit arguing with Reality, including the past). So much to see through, eh?
So, yeah, coming more from my sense of my self rather than Self if that's what you meant.
BTW, I think one of my main points has been that it is useful for people at a certain point in their journey to hear that awakening is possible at any moment, and it is not for special gurus and saints alone. That's one thing I feel is important - to normalize all this. It's actually if we want to simplify matters part of the maturation process, which too many of us think ends at puberty ;-)
Speaking of Bryon Katie (above), oh my that woman is a living example of an awakened Master (saw her from front row seat yesterday) that didn't have an inkling of spiritual truth or any spiritual resume under her belt when she awoke. She scrutinizes all her thinking impassionately, and thus lives in joy. She makes enlightenment quite ordinary.
What do you think?
namaste, e